My stories,My life

20 Things to Start Doing in Your Relationships

2012-01-31T11:39:00.002+08:00

Family isn’t always blood. They’re the people in your life who appreciate having you in theirs – the ones who encourage you to improve in healthy and exciting ways, and who not only embrace who you are now, but also embrace and embody who you want to be. These people – your real family – are the ones who truly matter.

Here are twenty tips to help you find and foster these special relationships.
1.Free yourself from negative people. – Spend time with nice people who are smart, driven and likeminded. Relationships should help you, not hurt you. Surround yourself with people who reflect the person you want to be. Choose friends who you are proud to know, people you admire, who love and respect you – people who make your day a little brighter simply by being in it. Life is too short to spend time with people who suck the happiness out of you. When you free yourself from negative people, you free yourself to be YOU – and being YOU is the only way to truly live. Read Stumbling on Happiness.
2.Let go of those who are already gone. – The sad truth is that there are some people who will only be there for you as long as you have something they need. When you no longer serve a purpose to them, they will leave. The good news is, if you tough it out, you’ll eventually weed these people out of your life and be left with some great people you can count on. We rarely lose friends and lovers, we just gradually figure out who our real ones are. So when people walk away from you, let them go. Your destiny is never tied to anyone who leaves you. It doesn’t mean they are bad people; it just means that their part in your story is over.
3.Give people you don’t know a fair chance. – When you look at a person, any person, remember that everyone has a story. Everyone has gone through something that has changed them, and forced them to grow. Every passing face on the street represents a story every bit as compelling and complicated as yours. We meet no ordinary people in our lives. If you give them a chance, everyone has something amazing to offer. So appreciate the possibility of new relationships as you naturally let go of old ones that no longer work. Trust your judgment. Embrace new relationships, knowing that you are entering into unfamiliar territory. Be ready to learn, be ready for a challenge, and be ready to meet someone that might just change your life forever.
4.Show everyone kindness and respect. – Treat everyone with kindness and respect, even those who are rude to you – not because they are nice, but because you are. There are no boundaries or classes that define a group of people that deserve to be respected. Treat everyone with the same level of respect you would give to your grandfather and the same level of patience you would have with your baby brother. People will notice your kindness.
5.Accept people just the way they are. – In most cases it’s impossible to change them anyway, and it’s rude to try. So save yourself from needless stress. Instead of trying to change others, give them your support and lead by example.
6.Encourage others and cheer for them. – Having an appreciation for how amazing the people around you are leads to good places – productive, fulfilling, peaceful places. So be happy for those who are making progress. Cheer for their victories. Be thankful for their blessings, openly. What goes around comes around, and sooner or later the people you’re cheering for will start cheering for you.
7.Be your imperfectly prefect self. – In this crazy world that’s trying to make you like everyone else, find the courage to keep being your awesome self. And when they laugh at you for being different, laugh back at them for being the same. Spend more time with those who make you smile and less time with those who you feel pressured to impress. Be your imperfectly perfect self around them. We are not perfect for everyone, we are only perfect for those select few people that really take the time to get to know us and love us for who we really are. And to those select few, being our imperfectly perfect self is what they love about us.
8.Forgive people and move forward. – Don’t live your life with hate in your heart. You will end up hurting yourself more than the people you hate. Forgiveness is not saying, “What you did to me is okay.” It is saying, “I’m not going to let what you did to me ruin my happiness forever.” Forgiveness is the remedy. It doesn’t mean you’re erasing the past, or forgetting what happened. It means you’re letting go of the resentment and pain, and instead choosing to learn from the incident and move on with your life. Remember, the less time you spend hating the people who hurt you, the more time you’ll have to love the people who love you.
9.Do little things every day for others. – Sometimes those little things occupy the biggest part of their hearts. You can’t be everything to everyone, but you can be everything to a few people. Decide who these people are in your life and treat them like royalty.
10.Pay attention to who your real friends are. – As we grow up, we realize it becomes less important to have more friends and more important to have real ones. Remember, life is kind of like a party. You invite a lot of people, some leave early, some stay all night, some laugh with you, some laugh at you, and some show up really late. But in the end, after the fun, there are a few who stay to help you clean up the mess. And most of the time, they aren’t even the ones who made the mess. These people are your real friends in life. They are the ones who matter most.
11.Always be loyal. – True love and real friendship aren’t about being inseparable. These relationships are about two people being true to each other even when they are separated. When it comes to relationships, remaining faithful is never an option, but a priority. Loyalty is everything.
12.Stay in better touch with people who matter to you. – In human relationships distance is not measured in miles, but in affection. Two people can be right next to each other, yet miles apart. So don’t ignore someone you care about, because lack of concern hurts more than angry words. Stay in touch with those who matter to you. Not because it’s convenient, but because they’re worth the extra effort. Remember, you don’t need a certain number of friends, just a number of friends you can be certain of. Paying attention to these people is a priority.
13.Keep your promises and tell the truth. – If you say you’re going to do something, DO IT! If you say you’re going to be somewhere, BE THERE! If you say you feel something, MEAN IT! If you can’t, won’t, and don’t, then DON’T LIE. It’s always better to tell people the truth up front. Don’t play games with people’s heads and hearts. Don’t tell half-truths and expect people to trust you when the full truth comes out; half-truths are no better than lies. Remember, love and friendship don’t hurt. Lying, cheating and screwing with people’s feelings and emotions hurts. Never mess with someone’s feelings just because you’re unsure of yours. Always be open and honest.
14.Give what you want to receive. – Don’t expect what you are not willing to give. Start practicing the golden rule. If you want love, give love. If you want friends, be friendly. If you want money, provide value. It works. It really is this simple. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
15.Say what you mean and mean what you say. – Give the people in your life the information they need, rather than expecting them to know the unknowable. Information is the grease that keeps the engine of communication functioning. Start communicating clearly. Don’t try to read other people’s minds, and don’t make other people try to read yours. Most problems, big and small, within a family, friendship, or business relationship, start with bad communication.
16.Allow others to make their own decisions. – Do not judge others by your own past. They are living a different life than you are. What might be good for one person may not be good for another. What might be bad for one person might change another person’s life for the better. Allow people to make their own mistakes and their own decisions.
17.Talk a little less, and listen more. – Less advice is often the best advice. People don’t need lots of advice, they need a listening ear and some positive reinforcement. What they want to know is often already somewhere inside of them. They just need time to think, be and breathe, and continue to explore the undirected journeys that will eventually help them find their direction.
18.Leave petty arguments alone. – Someone else doesn’t have to be wrong for you to be right. There are many roads to what’s right. And most of the time it just doesn’t matter that much. Read How To Win Friends and Influence People.
19.Ignore unconstructive, hurtful commentary. – No one has the right to judge you. They might have heard your stories, but they didn’t feel what you were going through. No matter what you do, there will always be someone who thinks differently. So concentrate on doing what you know in your heart is right. What most people think and say about you isn’t all that important. What is important is how you feel about yourself.
20.Pay attention to your relationship with yourself. – One of the most painful things in life is losing yourself in the process of loving others too much, and forgetting that you are special too. When was the last time someone told you that they loved you just the way you are, and that what you think and how you feel matters? When was the last time someone told you that you did a good job, or took you someplace, simply because they know you feel happy when you’re there? When was the last time that ‘someone’ was YOU?

home

2011-10-10T00:05:00.001+08:00

home...the word that made me shed some tears of sorrow this fateful day....

to most of the teenagers/young adults out there...

home might be a detestable place to you;
for u detest whatever is going on around at home....

home might be a wonderful place to you;
for u have wonderful family members that supports u all the way...

home might be a shelter to you;
for u to seek shelter amongst the darkest period(s) of ur life...

but

home to me...is nothing...
nothing...

nothing but an empty shell for me to hide from reality for the night...
nothing but 4 walls to look at whenever i step in...
nothing but a dear brother to look after,taking on the role of a mom,dad and bro...
nothing but another burden,a responsibility....

home...doesnt exist...not now...

2011-06-06T20:53:00.003+08:00

hah i wonder who ever still comes here....nonetheless this is the place i can rant w/o worries...

no idea which toes of yours i've stepped upon or were u born out of the wrong goddamn hole... you whine like a pussy, a total mummy's boy, can't even complete a mere 24km march and you even need padding for a vest like a woman....why the f are u in the army?! i wonder if u even have balls.....and who are u to criticise what i do when you are no better???

Seriously....if i don't have rules and laws restricting me now....i'd have made sure u wont want me as your enemy....

Your mouth is as loquacious as an auntie and you act totally like one....complaining every single stuff....urgh....just hope this fri comes and i'll see you NO MORE!

Annoying SOB

2011-03-27T00:09:00.001+08:00

People don’t look at your personality first. People judge you automatically by your looks and then try to get to know your personality. But the second they don’t like your looks, they don’t get to know you. That’s how reality is.

Honestly, I think I wanna die for a moment, even just for a second or two. I want to see how things are when I’m not around. I want to feel like I’m wanted and that I’m loved. But the real thing I want to see is you crying as much or maybe more than the tears that I’ve cried for you. Because right now, there’s no words not even gestures could ever describe the pain I’m feeling.

Thoughts....

2011-02-07T14:47:00.001+08:00

Hmm lately i've been thinking about what i can do in the future... a doctor or a teacher....

Both treats people... both saves people but in different ways...

A teacher is able to educate the students, correct the mindset and thus making the world a better place...

A doctor is able to cure the people and thus alleviate sufferings, making the world a better place too...

However, its hard to educate kids nowadays and make them internalise and practice what they are taught such as eating and staying healthy by exercising... it'll be useless to treat the illness but not the root cause of it which is what the doctors nowadays do... suppressing any ailments but not tackling the source of it...

Nonetheless it is also impossible to take up both roles at once...it really is tough to want to do something to help the society...probably a team comprise of an educator, researcher,doctor and not forgetting sponsors might just be able to help???

——————————————————

So far this yr's CNY is slightly better than the year before but due to the surprisingly long break, and the fact that i'm enlisting in 2 days' time, it kinda dampens the mood???

I started to prepare ( considered late) and im currently on my way to pasir ris army store to purchase additional shirt,shorts and socks lest the ones provided wouldnt dry in time...

Not really nervous nor excited but rather annoyed by it for there's so many things i want to do but its been disrupted by this....oh well....

I really hope u'll take care... probably you would have had insufficient rest during the past few days of CNY... i'm glad i managed to see u from afar one last time before i report for enlistment...not knowing whether any mishap will happen??? It's sad that i couldnt talk to you at all...nonetheless i wish u good luck in ur future endeavours and may u be happy always :)

I've nt been running for quite awhile...better do so b4 i suffer the consequences of failing IPPT haha...

Well, lucky for me that i have this phone that allows me to blog on my way to pasir ris currently otherwise i'd have to stone throughout this entirely lonely journey... hope the shop is still / has returned to opening for business....

leo

2011-01-29T02:33:00.002+08:00

狮子座

狮子座，一个博爱和充满阳光，能量的星座，其实狮子座的人很向往爱情，说白了就是狮子座的人最爱的是自己，他要让自己发光发热，获得别人的爱和崇敬，在这其中，他能够体会到这种来自他人的关爱而感到愉悦，于是，他就爱上了别人。。。

狮子座的人很不愿意伤害别人，因为他的内心是善良和充满正义感的，他是重视原则的人，但是，如果他做了伤害别人的事情，即便出于面子他没有说什么，但是其实内心里他会真的好自责好内疚的，虽然别人看不到，但是他的确会好难过。

狮子座的人，无论男女，都很容易陷入一份感情，但是热情来的很快，冷却的速度也快得惊人。如果他可以对一份感情持续很长的时间，那么恭喜了，说明你真的很强势很有魅力，足以让他对你死心塌地，否则，狮子座这种内在没有安全感又很敏感的动物，很可能从更有魅力和新鲜的事物上找温暖，因为，狮子座的我们看起来好坚强好阳光好乐观，但是骨子里面的不安感从未消退过，表面的自信只不过是保护自己的盔甲，但并不是很真实。

同时，狮子座的人也可以很绝情，不可能吃回头草，字典里没有'后悔'或者'回头'这两个词，因为狮子座的人很爱面子，自尊心比什么都重要，一旦放弃了或者决定了，就不可能回过头去改变，狮子座的人也很怕被伤害。宁可错过一份感情，宁可放弃。宁可不要，也不会冒可能会被伤害的危险，因为太不值得，因为狮子座的人太爱自己了。。。

狮子座的人喜欢热闹，但是也很享受孤独，他可以把这两者之间搞得很平衡，他很喜欢跟朋友一起，疯狂的玩闹，成为一个party的主角，但是回到家里，他立马就可以变得异常安静，不喜欢被打扰，他需要自己的空间来思考，如果不给狮子这个空间，对他步步紧逼，那么他一定会抓狂，变得不可理喻，他还会离开你，因为在狮子的字典里，'自由'和'自我'这两词的比重几乎占据了全部

还有，狮子座的人很喜欢新鲜的，华丽的，有质感的，昂贵的，有品位的东西，他也喜欢朴实，但是却不喜欢无聊和无趣，他害怕一成不变的枯燥，他害怕今天就能预见明天的可能性。

狮子座的人有两种不同的倾向，一种是很喜欢天然的东西，不喜欢过多的修饰；另一类是很喜欢奢华另类奇特的事物，更多是狮子座是两者兼有。

狮子座的人很宽容，通常不会因为小事而斤斤计较，他们喜欢展现自己与众不同的仁慈心和获得尊重。对于过往的爱人，狮子座的人很少去探讨是谁的功过是非，无论当时对方有多伤害自己，但是过去了就过去了，狮子座的人不会去诅咒或者怨恨，因为他们喜欢向前看。狮子座的人相信，只要自己完美和努力，幸福就在前方，更美好的一定在等待着我们！！

Genting...Shoes...

2011-01-27T22:30:00.017+08:00

I'm finally back from genting trip with my classmates haha...enjoyable though there's 1 particular unpleasant event which i doubt i can ever forget... imagine how you'd feel if...

On the first night after you reach genting, you're hungry and the weather is really cold...Looking at the food which seems to call out to you to eat them and since they specialise in Chicken, naturally you'd want to try... And give that my friend is sick, we asked if we can have a dish where the sides are all the same...and wow...he said sorry no... =.= then he say "oh the dish only have 1 side dish" when the menu writes " 3 side dish and 1 muffin ". so we can only say okay.so i went ahead to order 1/2 Smoked BBQ chicken with mash potato,pasta salad and potato salad. 5 mins later the one who took my order came back and said sorry we don't have smoked bbq chicken anymore.Fine. so i change my order to phoenix chicken which he didn inform me it'd be 1/4 size instead of 1/2.Naturally you'd have thought it'd be 1/2 isn't it??? so came our dish and guess wad??? 2 of my friends got their chicken 1/2 sized instead of 1/4 while mine was the opposite. =.= Well,since the price would definitely differ, and we really wanted our correct orders so we explain and got a change...then this clever one told me there's no 1/2 size for phoenix chicken...WTH! fine...so i got original one instead and i clearly mention 1/2 !!!! but it came 1/4 with wrong side dishes....ROAR!!!!! ok i shan't continue...my blood will boil... yep so we went on our trip outside genting for a short while...gosh it's super cooling!! unlike Singapore's hot weather...it's really awesome...Look at the photo and you'll see how FOGGY it is = how cold it gets!

den we went to eat Baskin Robbins. Though Haagen Dazs' ice cream are still my favs but their's aint that bad too especially their Strawberry shortcake ice cream where u can really taste the crust of the Cake itself...
AWESOME!! then we went back to hotel and prepared to celebrate Aaron's birthday...EPIC...The cake u see below is a mixture of really chocolate from Awfuly Chocolate and Darlie Toothpaste haha!!
looks like really cream isn't it??? haha then the torture came when this junk was stuffed right into his mouth followed by face xD and he starts to get weary when he's given the real cake!

epic moments...
Sleep comes right after that...phew ^^

It was a freezing night despite the fact that the fan wasn't turned on! But the night was peaceful and we wake up in the morning to have BUFFET!!!!!!
Food ain't wad i expected...it's good! haha quite a quick breakfast to me though...Since it is Foggy STILL....we went out on a "hike" haha. climbing down the hill on a chilly morning after breakfast is something nice actually...a change from daily routine in SG.
see how wet our hairs are??? that's how cold the weather is such that condensation occurs!

So we managed to walk back to First world hotel and slept for awhile before leaving for Mushroom FARM!!!!!!

The way the mushrooms are grown...it's exactly like those in HarvestMoon ! how cool....and at the same farm where there are food available, we had our lunch there and these are wad we ordered ^^

There's steamed fish, Chicken wings,four season beans, stir-fry mushrooms, venision stir fry with ginger and spring onions, and lastly, top-grade wok! awesome meal and it costs about 22 Rm which is less than 10Sing dollar per pax!!!

After Dinner we decided to go and try out 4D Haunted house:

Not scary and doesn't feel real...but oh well?

Heh heh...Night time we did something really daring...Eating Ice cream out in the Open area when the weather is really cold at 12 degree celsius!!!! but the feeling is really good.

We went back and bathe after a long day and we went over to the girls' room for a chat and supper...gosh thinking back i feel fat but...i guess i don't really wanna care about it already since i'm going in NS really soon...we had maggie mee and we played only a round of Bluff and most of us are tired already....

KO-ed right after i lie on bed xD

Next morning woke up in a daze...lack of sleep i supposed...and right after i'm ready...i stepped out only to see the others from another 2 rooms leaving with their bags...HaHa...i was like...OMG...then the 3 of us rush back in to pack our stuff and it's done in...5mins??? haha...luckily we were quite neat on the previous few days...

Decided to have dim sums for breakfast so we went to 好友记.

See the white dessert above??? it's almond beancurd but it's way too nice...the taste of almond is not too strong and the vanilla milk blends well with it....i'm missing it already!GOSH...

This breakfast last for 2hours and when we left it's already 12++ so we hang around and decided to wait till 2.15pm so we stayed at starbucks :D

After that we set off for SINGAPORE!!! i really hate the awefully long bus rides!!! but still the trip was fun despite not being able to go outdoor theme park due to the fog :(

Went back CO today and seeing my jnrs improve, i do feel relieve but they still have quite a long way to go...all the best!

I went to CS Foodjunction for dinner (alone :[ ) and i recalled not being able to buy my shoes the other day so i decided to walk around to see if i can get any...and I DID!!!!

It costs $80 and since someone's paying for it, dun care!!! haha it should go well with my jeans and yea i managed to get SHIROI KOIBITO AGAIN!!!!! wad a fruitful day ^^ shall go have a teaspoon of my Haagen Dazs greentea ice cream ^^

Ta-ta

Addiction and adventure

2011-01-24T07:41:00.001+08:00

Its past a week since i bought those chinese goodies and the shocking fact that i've cleared the box of pineapple tarts is quite hard for me to take...gosh...its rly addictive...cant stop popping one after another! So gonna grow fat but oh well...gng NS soon in a few weeks time so haha!

Went out with aunt and cousins ytd to buy new yr clothes...only managed to buy 2 shirts :( i couldnt find any shoes cuz my feet were oversized :( haiz...and since went by dhoby ghaut ( pardon the spelling error) and couldnt resist the urge to go back to poh guan to purchase another 2 box of pineapple tarts ^^ this time i bought another version of pineapple tarts where the pineapple becomes the filling wrapped within the buttery tarts.the texture and feeling is much different yet equally satisfying!

Currently on the bus with my classmates and heading towards genting...its my first time go overseas ( though just neighbouring country) with friends.i expect this trip would be fun and memorable??? A good time for the class to bond once again!

Nonethless im still a little worried leaving my brother all alone in SG...ahh guilty! luckily he's mature enough,probably an understatement due to his age but yea...he should be fine :) shall buy lots of good and stuff for him if i can ^^

Signing off!

comments

2011-01-19T23:07:00.003+08:00

Tired...after a day of Gym and baking cookies non-stop after i reach home and leaving house right after the cookies are done....gosh....what a day....

Came back home and started resting my worn out body half an hour ago ^^
So i begun trying out the CNY goodies i bought a few days ago...my comments??
amazing, ,marvelous, fantastic, incredible, eyes-pop, jaws drop! haha that's so Mr Neo...
i miss my sec sch teachers....haiz...

oh well back to topic...well they are indeed good..The pineapple tarts though look normal but they aren't as oily as some and the pineapple on top of the tart is HUGE.Most importantly for someone like me who is super sensitive to fat-related stuff, the tarts would not make u feel sick no matter how many you eat them :D

The Kueh Bangkits really live up to their reputation...it MELTS in your mouth literally...and the fragrance will fill up the mouth , the feeling is simply SHIOK!!! that's why it's my Fav ^^

Last item i bought was almond cookies...Not bad for someone who doesn't really like almond but it's a little too salty to me...but other than that, the crisp on the outside and the softness on the inside coupled with the strong aroma of almond is what gives it the UPS!!!

Shopping??? Nt exactly

2011-01-16T20:00:00.001+08:00

Phew many things have happened and nt plenty of time left before CNY arrives and shortly my ENLISTMENT :(

Anyway went to buy an oven tdy so that my cookies made ( fourth time ) can be perfect... haha but the results frm a toaster aint so bad i suppose :)

After bringing the oven hm i left for clarke quay to buy STICKY !!! High in demand cuz it tastes really good ! But too sweet for me :p

Bought about 10 packets of them then went to a jap store to buy biscuits ^^ heavenly haha

Since chinatown is within walking range of abt 200m , i decided to save on transport. Walking and finding POH GUAN whose famous for their chinese new yr delights :) bought pineapple tarts, almond cookies and kueh banghkit ^^

I really want to buy another box of kueh banghkit knowing that its ur favourite but....the thought that u said u wouldnt want to accept anything frm me by any means....it saddens me....haiz....

Oh well, have been blogging while waiting for train at clarke quay and now im on the way back to tamp...wad a fruitful day :)

Shall go NTUC later to top up ingredients so that i can use my new oven tmr ^^

Haiz i feel like a home maker suddenly haha ....

我以为。。。

2011-01-09T02:01:00.002+08:00

我以为，只要专心的守着一个人，那一个人，迟早都回看到，会明白的，但我好像错了。。。
这分开，我可能不能再把你当朋友。。。希望你别太在意，因为从头到尾，也许都是我一厢情愿。。。难道我真的错了吗？

2011-01-06T01:38:00.002+08:00

A girl who has a sweet & sour side, A girl who has her manners but knows when to use her ”IDGAF” attitude, A girl who can watch how she eats at the table but ain’t afraid to take down whatever’s on the plate at once, A girl who knows how to be mature but has her immature moments while having fun, A girl who can watch her tongue but ain’t afraid to swear up a storm when she’s pissed, A girl who has enough respect for herself to not be slutty but knows how to be a little nasty for her man, A girl who can act like an angel but has her devilish side come out from time to time, A girl who can be the sweetest girl to you or the craziest bitch you’ve ever dealt with depending on how you treat her.

I'm sorry for making you becoming cold towards me......

sorry that i loved you

2010-12-20T22:46:00.002+08:00

For all of the time that i tried for your smile
For making you think that i was worth the while
So your love love love love love would be mine

For sending you flowers and holding your hand
That no one was there to take a stand
But then love love love made us blind

And I’m so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I’m sorry that it came true
But sorry doesn’t turn back time

For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right

So sorry that i loved you
Sorry that i needed you
Sorry that i hold you tight

And I’m So sorry for...

Making you love me and saying goodbye
For being the one that taught you how to cry
It was love love love and it passed us by

For giving you every thing that you dreamed
For taking it back when i fled the scene
sorry love,for wasting your time

And I’m so sorry that I hurt you
Sorry that I fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I’m sorry that it came true
But sorry doesn’t turn back time

For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right

I’m so sorry that i loved you
Sorry that i needed you
Sorry that i hold you tight

And apology now after all of this time
Won’t make my difference tonight
But I’m hoping I’m Sorry will open your mind
To love love love love in your life

Sorry that i hurt you
Sorry that i fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you

I’m sorry that it came true
But sorry doesn’t turn back time
For all that i have done to you
I wish that i could make it right

So sorry that i hurt you
Sorry that i fell through
Sorry i was falling in love with you
I’m sorry that it came true
But sorry do can’t turn back time

I’m sorry that i loved you
I’m sorry that i hurt you
I’m so sorry that i loved you
I’m sorry that i hurt you
Sorry that i loved you

dream...

2010-12-17T21:27:00.004+08:00

Thinking of you has already became a second nature...anywhere i go would remind me the past,those memories...

I miss you so badly that i would even dream of you...

If only we could talk once more...

If only we can go back to how we were...

I tried moving on...

I failed...

I can't put you behind me because you simply meant too much to me...
People say that one would never stopped missing someone , but learned to live around the huge gaping hole of his or her absence...

To me, i can never live around the gaping hole of your absence...

You've integrated into my life such that i can't remove anything...

I no longer know what i should do but miss you...

I can never forget the past no matter how hard i try...

puzzling!!!!

2010-12-17T00:27:00.002+08:00

*yawns* so tired from a day of "hard work" in completing 5 jigsaw puzzles with my friends haha it was fun ^^ but seriously...chionging 5 in a day in NO JOKE! although its like 300 each and with one 500 seems little but it really tests one's patience ! and we managed to complete it in like....6 hours??? Fast i guess??? haha

Those puzzles were like pretty??? makes me wanna buy them and make them on my own now >.< After this I'll be back doing up christmas cards again... only managed to draw for 16 cards but i'm like super slow??? used up about 5 hours not inclusive of colouring and i have lots more to go...FIGHTING!!!

Seriously...any journey or almost anywhere would remind me of you...I really want to talk to you but...haiz...是心有余而力不足啊。。。

2010-12-14T22:18:00.002+08:00

Went gym today after i break away from it for so long.It felt good but it really sucks to go there alone especially when it's super crowded.No one to talk to while waiting for the equipments :(

Nonetheless i'm happy that my weight remained below 68kg after all these while of non-exercising and eating loads of junk food :D

I don't know if it's just me or what , i've been pondering over this for quite awhile now ever since mid-years okay that's quite awhile but the main thing is,i'm thinking if i'm sick-mentally because i've become really very health conscious and a little, slightly fattening food would simply irks me so bad. For example I cannot stand the smell of macdonald's fries because its simply too oily. See what i mean??? maybe this is the result of the project work i've worked on the year before but i feel like i'm far from being anorexic or bulimia for i will not skip meals nor vomit out what i'd just eaten but i do have the feeling that i'm slightly fat and i'd do whatever it takes to avoid food that is fattening. On the other side i'd take oatmeals, food high in fibre and protein, and i'm taking lots of fruits. Whenever i feel like i've over-eaten or anything i feel guilty and i'll find ways to burn of the excess calories...Is this normal??? o.O

Run...

2010-12-12T21:37:00.002+08:00

phew ran at least 4 km + 1km walk today was awesome ^^ But it struck me while running how unfit i've really become ever since I stopped PE in school and preparing for A levels...My stamina has dropped drastically that at the second round around the park,i'm already panting heavily...Time to start running again!
running for you~

你给了我梦想，而我却为了梦想，离开了你。。。

当你在找相对的另一半时，世界的另一边也有人在找你。当相对的人在一起时，人生才圆满。

爱情就像德士。。。有时它等你，有时你等它。。。但只要愿意等，一定等得到。。。
这就是我的信念。。。

2010-12-12T00:51:00.006+08:00

Shall blog before i go to bed so that there's time for my hair to dry :D

This week or rather these fews weeks i've been going out like there's no tomorrow mainly to shop for my prom stuff. Intended to wear smth really high-class but just can't seem to find one so end up i decided to wear a waistcoat coupled with a blazer and this was how i ended up looking like (ps for the slanted bow-tie ) :

still pretty satisfied though considered that i'm not good-looking at all..

went clubbing with classmates straight after prom at Zirca in Clarke Quay.Quite a messy place but can sort of imagined how it'd be like.Nothing special actually...couldn't get high though probably because the whole time at the dance floor, together with the guys our "mission" was more of protecting the girls lest some hay-wired guy decides to do something gross..

This "protecting" thingy kinda suits me i suppose.. since i'm really over-protective by nature...but things never turn out well because of that???

Anyway, we managed to stay awake overnight till 6 in the morning before catching the second train of that day to kovan and took 81 back to tamp.it's pretty tiring actually or probably age is really catching up??? haha ... The night was pretty well spent in my prespective....it's been quite a while since we stayed up together, chatting.The class which was pretty bonded initially has began to break apart....This supposed would be the last photo together....how sad...

haiz....really miss those times when we really get together and rush for project,trying to meet deadlines and stuff at Killiney kopitiam in changi airport overnight,our more-than-frequent meet-up sessions to celebrate every single thing haha...hope these memories can help to keep us together like a thin thread...

Then was Friday/ yesterday when the exco decided to visit our juniors in CO for whatever reasons and well i was pretty sick of staying at home so yea i decided to tag along but not-surprising, unlike prssco, mjco is still as boring,liveless and well simply no feelings for it.what to do, only a short span of 1.5 yrs of CO, nothing much can be said? After which we left and i end up having dinner alone which was really unbearable so i had it quick and left promptly before i start emo-ing again...

Went to tamp to look for presents and ideas for christmas giftcards etc etc....Wanted to do some cards but it's been ages since i last did something so kind of lost my confidence but well, have to wait for my photos to be developed before i can take any action...meanwhile probably i'll wait???

Today was a pretty tiring day...Went cycling with my sec sch clique at East Coast ^^
it was after our lunch at Pasta Mania in Parkway parade shopping mall...Felt so bad for being 1 hour late....I guess i really have to be more punctual...cycled for merely an hour and my butt starts to ache...no choice but we have to carry on for another hour.It was the fun and laughter that take away those pain on our butts i suppose haha but reality hit hard went we dismount from our bikes for return...guess i'm really going to have a tough day walking tmr >.<

I'm really looking forward to christmas now...making a simple yet impossible wish...If only santa comes and help me HAHA....nonetheless i'll still hope for the fateful day to arrive...2 yrs have past and i'll still wait...i promise.

busy busy

2010-12-08T14:57:00.002+08:00

These few weeks have been rather busy,busy looking for prom suits and stuff...have been walking around a few places a few times...got so sick of shopping already...and finally today i get to wear what i bought ^^ shall upload some pics after tonight's prom and clubbing.

gtg...byebye

happy birthday to you~

2010-12-04T22:14:00.003+08:00

posted this just before i sent an sms haha.

Not hoping that you'll come over to see this but if you did,hopefully this can help me convey some message.

Firstly,Wishing you a HAPPY 16th BIRTHDAY !

Wanted to be the last to wish u (and hope i did ) because i really hope you'll remember me for this.Remember that on this very day, i'm the last to wish you.

I also hope you'll remember that whenever u fall or whenever u feel cold and aloof, wherever u are and when all hope seems lost, there'll be this last person here,stretching out his hand to help,to hug, to pull you up.i'm always just a phone call or an sms away.

I may not be the first on your list. I may not be the most good-looking guy (not even close actually) .I may not be smart or with a super high EQ but i really hope to be the one who can share your weal and woes, walk with you on a rainy day especially when you are feeling down and out.

All these seems really impossible though.more like 可欲不可求。。。 but most importantly , i want you to be happy.

Once again , 生日快乐 ! :D

No matter how tough or how long , i'll always be waiting for the day when you'll finally accept me.

2010-11-23T19:02:00.000+08:00

下雨天失去他的凌晨两点
你哭着绝望得像没有明天
是第几遍这样的情节
撑起了双肩当你的屋檐
当晴天再一次光临你世界
提醒我该回到安全的界线
不用道谢我功成身退
我也从你身边享受到暧昧

我就是你的最佳男配角
没资格拥抱至少能依靠
我只想要在你的周围看你微笑
就已经感动到疯掉
继续当你的最佳男配角
趁结局没到浪漫多一秒
我不重要只要你得到幸福就好
不需要谁为我哀悼我自己走掉

当晴天再一次光临你世界
提醒我该回到安全的界线
不用道谢我功成身退
我也从你身边享受到暧昧
我就是你的最佳男配角
没资格拥抱至少能依靠
我只想要在你的周围看你微笑
就已经感动到疯掉
继续当你的最佳男配角
趁结局没到浪漫多一秒
我不重要只要你得到幸福就好
不需要谁为我哀悼请把我忘掉

haiz

2010-11-21T01:50:00.003+08:00

ok i'll do a quick post before going to bed...pretty worn out though i didn really study today...i'm so screwed...
anyway, see the guy up there happen to affect me pretty much because of certain exam issues...

Here's what he did :
He's taken O levels this yr, quite recently, and the thing he did was to take photos of his O lvl exam papers, social studies to be exact , approximately 15 mins right before the examination began.He was still using his phone and tweeting about this in front of the invigilator. This was then reported to SEAB and now it's caused pretty much an uproar on the news, in stomp etc etc

Why i decided to put this up here (not like anyone will be here to read) is simply to post about my thoughts on this.

Firstly, He's a student who doesn't really know how to follow rules and regulations set by the MOE where it is clearly stated and i believe mentioned by all school teachers, examiners that no phones or electronical devices capable of storing information is allowed in the examination room. He disregard that and used his phone blatantly right before the exam...He totally disgraced the school ( from outram if i'm not mistaken ) and Singapore as well...Though it's not as terrifying as the recently youth murder cases but in no doubt would it worsen the impression of singaporean students to the examination board.

Secondly,He is a rich kid, i believe, as during the interview which he wanted i suppose since he said he wanted attention,he said he is planning to go US to further his studies. His mom didn really reprimanded him for doing that during the exam which i'm really appalled because it's a serious thing to do . even though he is rich and given that he is currently in a one-parent family with his mom only,who migh have felt bad or trying her best to give his son whatever he wants ,i guess, should not let him act all big and mighty (just look at his face up there).Who does he think he is now? He made the news, he got all the attention he needed, thinking he could get away free and easy has really angered me quite abit. What if more and more other students in the coming years did something similar or even more serious than what he did?How is he going to explain to the school in US that he's gotten a 0 for that particular subject for O levels? How is the authority going to deal with this such that no similar events will happen in the future and that they are answerable to the public?He is not being very considerate here now both to society and to himself sadly and this brings me to the next point which is about the youths nowadays in general.

More and more youths are being attacked.Crimes are happening almost everyday which is reported in the news..What is going on in this society?? Why are these happening? just because we don't see eye-to-eye we have to take out parangs and knives to chop one another? so much for going to school and learning how to share,live harmoniously and that these education are heavily subsidised by the govt to raise the youths to be men and women of calibre. Why create so much social unrest, making everyone else suffer in fear, affecting the lives of innocent parties? Why can't everyone just take a step back and breathe in deeply before taking action?Ain't there friends beside who can stop one from acting on impulse?Why act because of a moment of folly and land yourself in jail? Controlling emotions seems to me a rather important lesson to be conducted regularly in schools now than any other subjects. No point having a country with talents, straight As students, well-educated youths but lacking in character, moral values. There may have civics and moral education but probably not enough given that the current society is becoming more and more diversified.

I'm pretty pessimistic about the future world actually...

oh well we have to take things as they come?and reciprocate accordingly...
just some of my thoughts in this post which have absolutely no intention to target anyone in particular.

what an unlucky day

2010-11-16T22:48:00.002+08:00

ARGH!!! what a bad day today.

First the Chemistry paper 2 was CRAP. Qn 2 22marks and i don't think i got even half of it. Depressed. Should never change your first answer.It is most of the time most accurate.oh well hope the moderation is kind enough for me to get an A otherwise i don't think there's anywhere i could go already.

Secondly,wanted to see doctor( like finally after a week ) but guessed what? the doctor don't want to see me lol how nice. there was like probably 6 patients only haiz. no choice, i decided to go to another clinic.Just when my turn is up, an old couple rushed in =.= then the clerk says " I didn't see them go in. I couldn't do anything. " Wow. She went in to tell the doctor and she came out saying they didn want to leave lols.What luck.oh well, just have to wait for my turn while having my fever shooting up.

Got myself some med.hope it can help deal with my fever fast....haiz...
I will remain single,in hope that the day will come where we can be together.
"If one doesn't mean anything to you,You won't go to the extent for that person." i guess this is true?
nights~

happy birthday mummy!

2010-11-15T10:14:00.002+08:00

Sigh..it's been two years since my mum had a proper birthday celebration..thought this year could have given her a better one but end up i'm down with a fever and there's goes the plan and add it up, it'll be 3 yrs already.

I feel bad. I know she's expecting my brother and I to be there yesterday. She must be kind of disappointed or even more now that she's emotionally more unstable.She's no longer who she was...or maybe she was.

She's different already, both physically and mentally . she doesn't talk like how she used to or maybe this is the real her ? i don't really know actually .

Without her things are very different at home as well. Roles in the family shifted unidirectionally towards me. i ended up need to take on the role of a mom, a father , an atm, a calendar or rather an organiser .

It's pretty frustrating when I see people my age enjoying their lives and complaining how bitterly unfair their lives were...what more do they want exactly??? haiz...i dun even have the former one...

back? maybe...

2010-11-13T23:45:00.005+08:00

well...it's been pretty long since i've last blogged so i decided to change the skin because i found this which kind of depicts my life this year - plain ( shall talk about that later ) anyway,the changing of blogskin can be a bit of a headache once u stopped doing it for awhile,the immense amount of words,they murder haha especially when you're not feeling well at all.

well...decided to blog abit since i'm a little sick and sick of studying as well and i think i really need to unwind myself a little before i really burst into bits.i don't know if any of the post latter might annoy any of you ( provided there is one ) so feel free to leave if u want.

Life has been tough this year....really tough....there weren't a single day i wasn't in school ( excluding weekends of course ) , even during march holidays(when i'm preparing for march block test), June holidays (when i'm studying for Mid-years exam),september holidays (preparing for prelims) and lastly...study break(for A levels).although the main reason is to study because there can't be a day without studying otherwise one will find himself losing touch and i mean it.The other reason i suppose is simply to run away from realities.

Too many things have happened during my years after secondary school = in Jc.Life weren't like before,not at all when new friends weren't like how the old ones were, when teachers aren't caring like those in secondary school,when every single thing in my life wanted a piece of me to the extent that i don't have time for myself, not much. I want to run away from everything and the only place that is far enough so that other things could not reach me yet not that far because afterall, i need to study and i need to go home( not that i really want to go home ) for i don't have a choice so the best alternative is school. Studying is all that i do basically. Nothing more Nothing less. i forced myself to stay awake till 1 am everyday, so that at night, i'll be so tired that i'd fall asleep immediately.Friends who knew told me to sleep earlier,mug lesser but they don't know how i feel.I want to forget all the unhappiness , all the regrets , all the guilt . I tried my best to focus on studying and nothing else so that my mind wouldn't wonder lest i should break down on important times.but i guess i eventually did.

Even the strongest man would fall. I thought i would be okay if i just hung on a little more but i was wrong. I started burning out during my prelims. I no longer have any mood to study. I did badly or rather not up to my expectations.i really thought i could do better...then came A levels.I thought i would pull through relatively better than i did for prelims but the unexpected came. I'm down with a fever ! Taking a Major exam that would determine your future is no easy task when you're having a fever. it really sucked. What's worst is that the ones whom you loved are no longer there for you..I need the encouragement from someone out there for i'm really too tired to carry on.The only thing that kept me going, was the "remedy" for curing fever . I'd never forget the last time i was down with a fever, you told me to take a bath , take a panadol , put on blanket and go to sleep . It worked. I was all better. This time i followed . IT WORKED AGAIN . Though it was not for long probably because this was an accumulated one for a year already but at least it allowed me to feel better after an afternoon nap and the next morning, the fever would be gone. I have no idea why the fever always comes back after the exam and it has been on and off since tuesday afternoon.Evey paper since then i have to fight with this little devil , even now. i really need a support....

I guess i'm a very very emotional guy because it took me a lot longer to try let go , and it hurts every second that i try and in the end, i still failed.maybe i'm not trying hard enough, i don' t know.I wanted someone to talk to but i don't know who i can turn to at all. I don't have close enough friends for me to let it all out . It has been lonelier than ever . probably i'm a little too greedy but i really wanted someone special to care for me, someone to ask me how are you feeling etc and i suppose it is normal for one to wish for someone like that to pop up in your life ??

oh well i guess i'm fated to be alone.

anyway, ending of with just something i feel proud of ^^ my brother has gotten straight As for his End-of-year exam ! although he's in P5 now but well if he can do well in school exam, given that they set question on electrochemistry where they are supposed to identify the missing item in the picture as salt bridge ( FYI, This is supposed to be taught in sec school ) , and luckily i taught him on that, he can even get an A* for science is simply amazing haha totally beyond my expectations !

Shall end here for now and wouldn't be back till after my A lvls which ends on 2DEC !!!!!!!!! so long!!! *may i get well soon* haiz......

Good luck and good night to you all(if there is one)
byes

不说出的温柔

你是否忘记了　那时候的笑容
如果我　已不在你心中

舍不得为什么　你说过　的以后
留下我　能不能圆梦

那天空　云很多　看不见你的轮廓
只剩下　太多来不及说

不说出的温柔　让你离开我
我以为你都会懂
等着你　我　才发现难过

很难说有没有　想念过你的手
可能是　我不愿去触碰
不记得本来你　有没有擦口红
反正是　我已经错过

那天空　云很多　看不见你的轮廓
剩下　太多来不及说

想哭的冲动　开始在失去以后
才等着你的手　拥抱我的寂寞
该说的时候　早应该大声的说
那种认真的沉默　弄巧成拙

不说出的温柔　让你离开我
我以为你　都会懂

想哭的冲动　开始在失去以后
已经擦干了泪　为何还有点痛
该说的时候　早应该大声的说
爱已经留下缺口　剩下沉默

不说出的温柔　让你离开我
去拥抱你要的梦
别担心我　我会好好过

If U're in a relationship, married or none, read this. U'll know why at the end.

2010-08-24T23:20:00.000+08:00

MARRIAGE

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside
the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.
My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.
Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

A CHRIST-CENTERED MARRIAGE IS A MARRIAGE THAT IS SURE TO LAST A LIFETIME.

So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate. Matthew 19:6.

By Stephanie Halmilton

persevere

2010-07-21T22:47:00.003+08:00

天将降大任于斯人，

必须劳其筋骨，

苦其心志，

饿其体肤，

空乏其身,

行拂乱其所为,

所以动心忍性,

曾益其所不能.

in other words,

所以上天将要降落重大责任在这样的人身上，

一定要道先使他的内心痛苦，

使他的筋骨劳累，

使他经受饥饿，

以致肌肤消瘦，

使他受贫困之苦，

使他做的事颠倒错乱，

总不如意，

通过那些来使他的内心警觉，

使他的性格坚定，

增加他不具备的才能。

jiayou to all reading my post ^^

my heart will go on and on....

2010-07-05T15:51:00.007+08:00

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Every night in my dreams

I see you ,i feel you,
That is how i know you go on.
Far across the distance
And spaces between us
You have come to show you go on

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

Love can touch us one time
And last for a lifetime
And never let go till we're one

Love was when I loved youOne true time I hold to
In my life we'll always go on

Near, far, wherever you are
I believe that the heart does go on
Once more you open the door
And you're here in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

There is some love that will not go away

You're here, there's nothing I fear,
And I know that my heart will go on
We'll stay forever this way
You are safe in my heart
And my heart will go on and on

wad do i really want...

2010-07-02T20:11:00.002+08:00

it's time to sort out my thinkings and seriously find out what i really want in life...

after seeing you at the bus stop,with another guy...lots of things started zooming into my head...

it's not that i'm jealous...no longer that anymore but the memories of the past where i used to be in that guy's position...den all of sudden i'm no longer there....

it's kinda hurts actually....that we can't even be friends.....

i hate to hide how i'm feeling but there's no one i can turn to at all....one friend may be suitable for this topic but not the other topic...and it would be kinda stupid to go around finding friends to talk about my stuff...haiz...so i ended up talking to this dumb place...half hoping that no one will read yet on the other half,hoping someone....just some kind soul,willing to come and get me outta this god damn stupid situation...

so while thinking half the time at home today,i realised what i really wanted....was a relationship....someone to be with close enough that allows me to share my woes and yet keep my mind off those things and serve as a pillar of support....a support that i need to tide over the stress in school,home,finances...everything....but then there wouldn't be one anyway....who would want a freak like me? ....haha....

life???...seoul garden...^^

2010-07-01T19:45:00.001+08:00

earlier today...while going to sch, as usual,there's these 2 brothers from metta sch (for the mentally disabled) on the bus and there they were shouting at each other bcuz the younger one didn't want to take his bag...abit lame but...while finding them annoying,disrupting the peaceful trip on the early morning,it suddenly occured to me that it can be quite nice to be like them for awhile for they aren't bothered by how others looked at them and in life,they don't have as much worries as we normal people do...they just lead their life as per "normal" and they are happy...for example,they younger bro would wear sunglasses on a bus while going out with parents and they don't give a damn to how others think of them...how nice it'd be to be like them for awhile to do things that u really like and feel good about it without someone else noticing and criticising u about it...
well maybe it's the stress from exams and life at home that makes me think about it so much...but seriously...sometimes i wish i could just step away from all else,and not think about them at all...all the hurting stuff,all the sad memories...but i don't think i can ever have that opportunity.....

then i went to school for a 3 hour math paper (and this was how i felt in the midst of the exam ):

which i had no confidence of at all zzz....math was so easy during sec school....haiz....but after that decided not to think about it already and i went to seoul garden ytd to celebrate my friend's birthday ^^ but sadly we weren't able to gobble down a cow worth of beef :( [that was our initial goal ]but oh well at least we had over fun and fill :) but maybe abit too much that we felt like puking after we left that horrible smelling and smoky place as that place is seriously poor ventilated....the smoke just lingers around in that place till our bag had the smoky smell....disgusting!!! but oh well..wad to do??...
anyway,after that we went to a basketball near his house to play bball but sadly the ball no air den we had to borrow from some secondary sch kids since they brought along 2 :)
sad to say we still have to share court and only played a short while and we realised that our skills really cui ttm...haha....time to catch up soon....but well,it was worthwhile :)

wad's father's day??

2010-06-21T11:03:00.002+08:00

I didn't know ytd was father's day till the channel 8's news reported about places being crowded with people to celebrate and that some business profits have raised compared to the previous yr but well,that's not the point....

well,wad came to my mind was this day never ever appeared in my life all these years....i nvr remembered once i celebrated this day....a mixture of feelings surged and became overwhelming...

initially,i feel kind of....sad actually....that i nvr really had a father....he is always physically there but nothing more....all the memories with him inside are all...the bad ones...not that i selectively choose to rmb the bad ones but the only ones that surfaced are mere sad and bad ones....which makes me wonder why i'm born =.=

then i felt envious and jealous(they are different)...envious of those kids whose dad dotes on their kids,who accepted their kids for who they are,and jealous of those kids whose dad are willing to spend time,even if it's little, to joke,teach,and put in effort to talk to their kids....
my father nvr do any of these...at all.... and who's dad in the world will grumble about his kids being ugly?? __

followed it is anger....anger at those kids who grumble about their father...doing things unneccesarily,care too much about their life etc....srsly....why can't they appreciate what they have that others don't....guess that's about humans...

and came the feeling of hatred....hated him for who he was and still is....hated him for his rotten character....hated every part about him.....

and lastly acceptance...accepting how my fate is....a life w/o a complete family since younger and nvr will have....a lonely life....and lastly...there's nvr a father's day in my dictionary....that's my conclusion.... :@

journey to the west~

2010-06-18T20:52:00.003+08:00

it's been quite awhile since i last blogged and it looked kinda dead...oh well...wad to do? anyway shall do some spacing to make my post look longer otherwise it always seems so short and boring.
(it's been quite awhile since we last met....though it is still awkward meeting each
anyway,ytd went for prss 25th anniversary concert " seize the moment " which quite applies to
(other at the unloading bay....the most i could was to conjuer up a smile and before
me for i thought i ordered a ticket from ty who till later realised that he forget about
(i knew it,it'd faded away....wanted to call you to ask if you all wanted to join us
mine thus i SEIZED THE MOMENT to get the last ticket from the reception counter that
(but well,i've only managed to pluck up the courage to call her instead....i hate
cost slightly cheaper -$25 ^^ and better seat as it was a level higher thus able to
the fact that we've both drifted so far apart....way too far....i missed those times
view the performers more clearly :)( and the one i couldn't ake my eyes off was you...)

rather appalled by the hip hop performers as it's going to be a new cca
(when we're tgt....laughing....though i spent lots of time on the phone...at
which...seems nice yet not so nice....but the rest was rather nice,worth watching
(least....i felt happier than i am now....when i saw the photos,it reminded me of
esp CO's performance :) but super embarassing to see my face up on the screen zzz....

oh well good job to all those performers who sacrificed 3/4 of their hols for this
(2yrs ago when we're at esplanade....haha....i could even get jealous over taking
and the remaining one week for camp...good luck in completing your holiday homework
(photos...zzz...but that does show how impt u are to me....isn't it?...
haha...i've got tonnes up my sleeves :( after which we board a free bus back to
(but things have far changed....we no longer talk...at all....i...haiz....
prss and had supper at 201 till...1am haha kinda enjoyable after such a long time
i feel ike waiting once again....the urge is simple so strong....
since i've met up with them....still,i felt rather guilty for i ate a little too
but am i doing the right thing?.....
much and including my dinner,i had over eaten :P end up i walked from 201 back home to make
all i can say is....ltxy...i need you....
up for that :P that 's like east to west haha though not a lot but at least i know it does helped :)

shall go for a run tmr at the park

to burn burn burn :)

see it does looked longer :)

2010-06-01T01:30:00.002+08:00

Scientists also conclude that tea extracts are better taken between meals in order to avoid decreased iron absorption and Excessive intake of green tea extracts containing caffeine has side effects where an excessive concentration may act as a pro-oxidant to damage DNA.

Weight training has also been shown to benefit dieters as it inhibits lean body mass loss (as opposed to fat loss) when under a caloric deficit.[18]

Weight training also strengthens bones, helping to prevent bone loss and osteoporosis. By increasing muscular strength and improving balance, weight training can reduce falls by elderly persons as well

just some fun facts :)

HELP

2010-05-22T21:02:00.003+08:00

haiz....haven't been studying lately...not even mentioning to focus....don't know why just can't set my mind to study....and worse when GP mye is just a week away...
seriously i need someone to force me to study....no need long....just kick start the process...i have a super high activation energy,like some humongous boulder obstructing the way....though i seem to be able to know it but i can't identify the root cause....maybe it's the laptop...i don't know...but i hope there's someone out there,some kind soul who'll be willing to help me...

the cloud may be going its own way,but it needs to cleanse and calm the heart down and activates the energy before things gets out of hand...may there be harmony reside in me for i need to blow and direct this danger away before it cannot be caught.

2010-05-15T14:40:00.004+08:00

this whole week was pretty hectic...started school on monday with a low note...pretty dull and really nothing much....then came tuesday with econs test and a piece of sad new....Mr Hon will be leaving my class after thurs...just when i thought i'd be able to do well for econs with him around...just when i'm seeing the spark of interest for econs....he left.... !@#$%^&* haiz....the test was pretty caught off guard....though i "prepared" sufficiently,it's was pretty useless zzz....more of application than regurgitating....oh well...then came wednesday where i had to skip extra lessons and math test for medical checkup....worse still is that 1 paid $60 only to receive the news that my knee is fine,nothing bad enough that can be discovered using x-ray so....ya....had to do my napfa test =.= and i wasted 3hrs!wth la...den i went home,changed and go gym and went back home,had dinner and studied for my chem spa for tmr and that's all i did! and i slept...afterwards which was rather horrible as i only slept for...less than 4hrs? from 12 to 3+ am! which then i was woken up by nothing...YES NOTHING and i could hardly go back to sleep only feeling warm and sweaty urgh.....den i managed to fell asleep before waking up an hr later at about 5.45? retarded can....SPA was okay....hopefull can get a full package then i wanted to go for blood donation but nahh....since i'm taking my napfa tmr i'd better conserve my blood till tmr :) friday morning was kinda...weird....at the same time i feel excited for napfa haha dunno why but also i feel sian....cuz i had to do napfa without and trg b4 hand...=.= in the end..managed to get gold but....haiz....kinda disappointed with my 2.4 la 10mins 34 sec! slowed by 10s compared to last yr,away from A by 14s! haiz...and i cannot retake again...sadded....oh well den 2 hrs later when i'm dismissed i went for BLOOD DONATION haha quite happy that i'm O+ so i'm a universal donor :) hope i can save many lives...or even my own when i need that :) i even look at the needle that went into my own flesh HAHA!!!! i'm a saddist XD though i was kinda crazy to donate blood after napfa with only a light "lunch" of 2 sandwich and a 100plus after napfa haha but not bad i didn faint :D but after i reach home i KO-ed lol rly quite taxing on my body...hmm shall not try to do that again :) the next time i can donate blood is 6Aug,2 days away from my bday lol shall try to find the next donation drive in Sing :) oh well gtg hwk-ing alr shall post soon....

i would encourage ppl to donate blood though it can be quite scary for you all but think outside...think of who u can save....you might be able to save a friend...you nvr know :)

healthy?

2010-05-08T21:41:00.002+08:00

gosh it's been quite sometime since i last blogged haha...oh well have been pretty busy.....
recently i have been quite into health and fitness and realised that i have always been over-eating,somewhat carbo-over loading..so i've been going into a regime and a well-planned diet and wow i've lost 4kgs over a few weeks :D basically wad i did was to count the amount of calories i will burn without doing any excercise which is about 1800 and inclusive of excercise is about 2500. so i aim to burn about 10-12% of body fats in 10 weeks so i have to control wad i eat therefore i followed a 1600 calories diet that's low in fats,cholestrol,sugar and salt. then the qn may come...won't u get hungry when i eat so little? well the answer is no. the way i eat will ensure that the calories are effectively burned so that i won't feel hungry and binge.

this scenario might be familiar: you wake up late or didn't have time to take breakfast so u go on an empty stomach to school and then by recess or lunch you feel hungry so you eat a large amount of food den by lunch u dun feel hungry so u either skip or buy a bread....by dinner u are famished again so u gorge happily on your sumptious meal and before u know it,you've over-eaten! and once u over eat,additional calories will be stored as fats.

so wad i did was to separate out the meals evenly so that my body burns them effectively without having too much calories in excess to be stored as fats.so at the same time i won't really feel too hungry such that simple and light meals are sufficient and my body is actively burning the calories so my metabolism is working actively :)

also,varying the food i eat is impt so that i won't get tired and give up on the plan :)

ytd went for a swim after a long time...really felt horrible that my stamina decreased like no one's business...panting after just 2 laps?haha den i tried to shorten my resting period for another 4 laps,2 laps after 2 laps.den there's this coach that wanted his students to swim 20 laps within 20 mins due the exam that's round the corner..haha it sure brings back memories..that's wad i used to do last time :) so feeling a little competitive,(no i didn challenge the students) i tried to swim non-stop for 20 mins without trying to slow down to accomodate my body and surprisingly i managed to do that for 30 mins lol before i decided to stop before my body collapse and wow it felt so good :) however,when i reached home i felt as though i'm dying.maybe i exerted too much that i fell asleep on the sofa haha.but it sure feels good to know that at least 500 calories were burnt for me swimming for 1 hr :)

oh well time to go do hw...seeya!

2010-01-16T15:16:00.001+08:00

I saw this in my friend's blog *adelyn and find it super meaningful! shall practise all these everyday :)

HANDBOOK 2010

Health:
1. Drink plenty of water.
2. Eat breakfast like a king, lunch like a prince and dinner like a beggar.
3. Eat more foods that grow on trees and plants and eat less food that is manufactured in plants..
4. Live with the 3 E’s — Energy, Enthusiasm and Empathy
5. Make time to pray daily.
6. Play more games .
7. Read more books than you did in 2009 .
8. Sit in silence for at least 10 minutes each day
9. Sleep for 7 hours.
10. Take a 10-30 minutes walk daily. And while you walk, smile.

Personality:
11. Don’t compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
12. Don’t have negative thoughts or things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment.
13. Don’t over do it. Keep your limits.
14. Don’t take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
15. Don’t waste your precious energy on gossip.
16. Dream more while you are awake.
17. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
18. Forget issues of the past. Don’t remind your partner with His/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
19. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don’t hate others.
20. Make peace with your past so it won’t spoil the present.
21. No one is in charge of your happiness except you.
22. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
23. Smile and laugh more.
24. You don’t have to win every argument. Agree to disagree…

Society:
25. Call your family often.
26. Each day give something good to others.
27. Forgive everyone for everything..
28. Spend time with people over the age of 70 and under the age of 6.
29. Try to make at least three people smile each day.
30. What other people think of you is none of your business.
31. Your job won’t take care of you when you are sick. Your friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
32. Do the right thing!
33. Get rid of anything that isn’t useful, beautiful or joyful.
34. God heals everything.
35. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
36. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
37. The best is yet to come..
38. When you awake alive in the morning, thank God for it.
39. Your Inner most is always happy. So, be happy.

alright shall go study...ta-ta

2010-01-04T17:02:00.002+08:00

two years ago,this very same day,we were at tampines mall,then at the playground, having a little fun,chatting and stuff though i was evil enough...but 2 yrs later, we hardly talk...like strangers...
how i wished time could have stopped then...really hate the life now....everthing's going downhill, nothing ever seemed to go right anymore...no one's there when i needed to talk...damn it....

2010-01-04T00:12:00.000+08:00

now come to think of it....i'm pretty stupid....oh well....wadeva....

camp =)

2009-12-21T01:56:00.001+08:00

Well..after 2 days of camp and 16hrs of after camp rest i'm here mentally rested but physically tired haha aching here and there....haiz...i'm old....anyway the camp is....indescribable... overall the camp was pretty smooth and i must say it's a fruitful and valuable camp...

started of day 1 in the school at 9.15am to set up the camp with alumnis in CO room...feeling was..excited but a little held back because didn't really know a few of them due to generation gaps....had lunch then camp starts....

Audrina was my partner and we met our group...quite an interesting batch because it's a perfect mixture of ppl...from high to stable to quiet haha and equal number of each as well....had a tough time getting them though but i supposed that's the main challenge...

Had ice breaker followed by fast and furious...like their team spirit the 永不言败 spirit althought they got 4th place=last but they wasn't affected by it =) very optimistic =) and surprisingly they completed it within 1/2 hr!!!!! supposedly to be a 1hr game but their speed is....imba =D then had team building :) see their flour face playing chapteh...pretty funny haha and expected none can kick 7 times including myself XD
mummy was exciting i must say because my group's challenge was to protect someone when all of them are of the same height and only 2guys!! but they managed to cover all 7 chairs *claps claps* respectable!!!!! knowing that they might be at disadvantage so they took risk and get the chairs =) good strategy *

after their wash ups and dinner was chingwei's talk...i can only say simply remarkable.3hrs full FULL of guidelines to info to basically everything that a leader should have and i also picked up quite alot from there.Things that seems mundane and minute can actually have a serious impact like making a call.What i felt nice was that after hearing from them and reading some of their blogs they actually appreciated the talk and liked it which i think was important because that's the time when they can really absorb what he said and probably apply it next yr.hope this batch of ppl can make a difference to CO.

Had supper at teh tarik...then went back but suddenly got a call from vivien then i shock dao...then after hear her talk got more shock cuz 2nd time got ppl sore-eye during camp and no eye-drops available...so my mind was like....okay must faster get it so that weiling wont feel terrible then can sleep so tt tmr won't tired and there goes my leg...run non-stop to find 7-11 after asking a couple who told me that there's one opp. CPF building but can't find then run to cheers but not sure if eye-mo was e one so called back and ask haha then ok got it then run back with it until it reaches weiling haha like some drama show but ya then found out that gy girls are....weird! one hand/arm cramp, one leg cramp,one eye-sore,one wake up in e middle of the night blur blur den halfway go borrow water bottle for water and lastly one can sleep while sitting down back leaning on wall or something like that...how cool is that! haha

then they wake up super early!!! even before 6 they are up going toilet for wash-ups already! omg la and some even bathed!impressive because the night(morning) was cold and they can take it.then we had a briefing for morning's first game-fight for survival.seriously fight.one group wanted beehoon so badly that they used the food names in their cheer! nice though it didn make much sense but well at least it showed that they are determined :) seeing some of their faces when the group didn have their breakfast was....like the aim was achieved...seeing all of them sharing their food...heart-warming i must say.after that is...capture the flag.it seems easy but i was wrong....after 1 short round my engine run out of steam....maybe partially because i didn sleep but seriously...2nd was like...no breath to even walk and legs are super stiff alr.but well it's fun playing with juniors :) after that is talk then lunch then pbl and lastly ultimate frisbee. the proposal talk was interesting as the characters of each ppl who are presenting can be seen clearly when they are asked to present.
Lunch wasn't good bcuz i think i lack of sleep so i didn't feel like having lunch but thanks to mr wong's coffee which is like 如鱼得水 i immediately woke up after drinking it =D
ultimate frisbee haha....fun and funny ttm :)should have taken videos but oh well :)

overall it's enriching and fun...hope to have this sort of camps again!
ok ta-ta

4km

2009-12-16T21:39:00.002+08:00

well just another day....meet up early for camp prep and somewhat finish what needs to be done today (though mainly talking and joking ard) at around 12.40 den went for lunch and watched STORM WARRIORS =) kinda dots though because throughout the entire movie,almost all slow-motion...wonder how the actors can stand filming haha...storyline,kinda okay (provided you know what's going on ) yep then went to collect sheng <笙> den went home...changed den head for gym!!!
haha another 4km in 20 mins =D den cooled down for about 8 mins so total about 4.35 km,300+ calories burned haha! satisfaction much! den workout-ed for another hour or so den went cycling on the machine so another 100 calories! wa-ha!!! total i think got 500 ba :) slim slim slim down!!!!
okok needa study alr....
bye~

2009-11-16T23:03:00.002+08:00

o.O
today my bro went for camp....wonder how was it haha...but i miss him lols!Looks like we really can't be separated....can die....didn expect myself to become moody cuz he's away XD...wanted to find someone to talk to....but well...it's okay....just smth i don't understand....why issit that we can't even chat now....why can't things just go back to how it was?seriously....what have i done wrong.....will you please tell me.....why are you always so put off by me.....why.....

zzz....

2009-11-07T18:11:00.002+08:00

random thoughts going throught my mind again....
but still....i just dun understand....
it ended....like nothing ever happened....
but how....those times together....those laughter....those talking to late nights....
now we're like strangers....why....why things just dun work....

friends? haha......

2009-10-28T20:27:00.003+08:00

there's no such thing as friendship in my dictionary....
....
friendship.....what's it exactly....srsly i have no idea.....
friendship is like.....peeing on your pants....where everyone can see....but only he/she can feel the warmth....
friendship....haha....i have never felt it that way....come to think of it.....never once was i treated like a true friend....
i'm always the one people look for when they need help....when they need me to help them do a particular stuff....
what do i get in return? their forgetfullness that i am their FRIEND....
i'm always the last to receive any news regarding anything....worst....i'm always the one people with "give it a miss"....thanks so much for being a friend....
i'm always the one being left out....people never realise my presence until they sense that i'm....not around,when i'm too quiet etc....
why can't i ever experience true friendship....
maybe it is true that i'm meant to be alone....to be.....away.....to be....forgotten.....
well....that sucks but.....i just can't do a thing about it.....
damn....
back to my EMO self i supposed....no point trying so hard to make ppl notice me just a little more....no point trying to make friends when it's as good as not having one....no point ....just no point.....to think i might have a different life compared to that in secondary school but.....i suppose not....life nvr change does it......

难听的话。。。。

2009-10-28T19:46:00.002+08:00

难听的话。。。往往都是人所不想听到的。。。他们不愿意面对事实。。。但。。。难听的话往往都是最有道理的。。。

看见你这样，我感到十分心酸。。。很想帮，但一点也帮不上任何事。。。很想和你聊聊，却又不知从何聊起，没机会说，也没资格说。。。有时，我真的很想狠狠的骂你一顿，却又不忍心伤你的心。。。我感到很无奈。。。为什么我不是

我开始发现自己很没用。。。想帮又帮不了，想说却说不成，想骂却骂不下，想亲切一些却不在掌控之中。。。好烂好烂。。。难道真的没有任何事是我能做的吗？。。。

sometimes a break can help us walk a further distance...

2009-07-19T22:22:00.009+08:00

it's been quite awhile since i last posted well nothing much to post anyway until last friday well shall post 2 things today...
firstly,this is something i learned that's all around waiting to seize our cells....virus!
(shall use this to help a little on my revision so pardon me if it get's too chim and bio :P)

Viruses are obligate intracelluar parasites...meaning? they Bind(obligate) to a host cell and within the host cell(intracellular),they caused diseases ( parasites ) why? because they lack metabolic enzymes and organelles for protein synthesis need the host's polymerases and ribosomes in order to replicate and synthesise virions even though they're similar to human or any other living organisms with genetic material ,either Dna or Rna,single or double stranded,protected by capsid made of capsomeres.overall they are known as nucleocapsid (:

they can be helical,icosahedral,or complex in shape. An example of complex shape is BACTERIOPHAGE...here:

next might not be as boring...animal virus= influenze virus commonly known as flu (:
that's why we have H1N1 swine flu or H5n1 avian flu.these are Type A viruses that are infectious,causing human pandemic.
Type B and C however are small and mild without subtype so dun bother (:
It has an envelope with glycoproteins(glycogen + proteins):
Hemagluttinin(HA) for binding to target cells and
Neuraminidase(NA) for release of progeny virus (offspring of viruses) from infected host cells.
These 2 are antigens where antibodies in body or antivial drugs(medicine) can be found.they look like this :

nice eh??? haha

alright enough of biology,now's about yesterday...nothing exciting,morning had tuition,then went out with bro for movie at suntec,harry potter and the half-blood prince (:

well overall it's not that bad but the previous series are better and i seriously think harry and hermione should be together lol! XD
the ending is a little sad though and i hope the next movie comes fast...because the story have yet to end...leave it hanging there....make the audience disappointed...lol those who have watched it will understand why (:
oh well that's all for now....bye~

sometimes we should stop and take a rest....take a look at surrounding and enjoy LIFE

2009-07-07T21:37:00.009+08:00

Well it's been pretty long since i last blogged...shall update a little about wad i've done for the past week and ytd as well...

Last thursday went to watch ice age after the end of chemistry paper which was.........haha...the show is nice or i'd rather say it's amazing as the effects is superb with lots of comedies in it.I'd give it a 4 out of 5...why? because the one i watched is not in 3-D thus minus the 1 mark haha..I would really recommend it!and i got this tumbbler from the combo,it's pretty nice (:
then friday...went bowling with friends and then....nothing lol....nothing much on that day...
THen it's saturday,no tuition,no lesson WOOTS! so went out with gy peeps for ice age again haha but it's still nice (: then we chatted,had lunch and chilled until 5.30 ++ then we went on separate ways and viola (: oh and watched harry potter and chnl 5! (:july 16 ,harry potter & e half blood prince awaits!

SUNDAY! went out early in the morning to visit my mom and then went to buy my stuffs and yep went home after that...nothing as well...boring...

Monday went sentosa with classmates (: it's really nice & had lots of fun! got a little sunburn,a little red but not pain (: now my arms are red while my body's....normal..hah....going to swim to get tanned!!!here's some pics (: ok don't stare at the pic...i'm fat >.<

below are some food i ate for dinner which i snot really worth it as the serving size is too small and little for the price....12.35 for the meal =.= at "musselman" I'd seriously discourage anyone going there....anyway...here they are : (small cup of tea served =.=)
(by the picture above is not wad i ordered...my friend did...it's omelette fried rice with chicken wings which is so puny,more like drumlets....)
(this was wad i ordered,spaghetti with mushroom cream sauce...)

oh and i saw a zinc bag that's real cool! i wanna get it but i'm broke :( oh well that's life....gotta go~
seeya!

study = hardwork + interest / passion + fun

2009-06-28T02:39:00.004+08:00

haha a picture speaks a thousand words...yep i'm cramming my heads with all info now haha...well something that came to my mind is that many people don't like exams nor studying even i can't avoid that at times and i have been liking studying for quite some time and the main reason is due to the word in the picture below...

YES INTEREST!!! only interest can lengthen one's attention span during studying and also the attitude towards exam...think...if one has the interest to study he or she will study and since he or she studied,they will be well prepared and hence won't dread of exam...make sense isn't it...haha
HOPE all friends out there find your passion in studying and you'll succeed!
i'm tired...haha
ta-ta

yesterday today tomorrow

2009-06-26T12:57:00.002+08:00

There's a saying," yesterday's a history,tomorrow's a mystery,today's a gift"
We live through everyday like opening a box...
Yesterday we have opened a box..whatever item you get or what have happened,it's over...
Today's the time when a new box is opened.It's a gift depends on how you look at it...
Tomorrow's box to be opened will remain a mystery until tomorrow has arrived...
So forget about yesterday,and treasure what you have today for it's a gift...no point brooding over what has happened for time will never turn back and let you open the box again...
And don't waste time thinking what you'll get tomorrow for you'll know it tomorrow (:
So just treasure what you have been given today for you don't know what might happen tomorrow!

~just my thoughts...
thanks for reading!
ta-ta!

2009-06-25T12:06:00.003+08:00

Hi all...just thought of something nice thus i decided to share it here...hope you all learns smth from here (:

see the BUTTERFREE (just in case you don't know,it's a pokemon =] ) up there? well today's topic is linked to butterflies(:

[Due to the fact that the real butterflies doesn't look as cute but rather more hideous looking that's why i used the butterfree(: ]

Bet some/most of you don't know that during the pupal transformation into a butterfly ,to transform from the miniature wings visible on the outside of the pupa into large structures usable for flight, the pupal wings undergo rapid mitosis(cell division) and absorb alot of nutrients and after it emerges from its pupal stage, a butterfly cannot fly until the wings are unfolded. A newly-emerged butterfly needs to spend some time inflating its wings with blood and letting them dry.So the butterfly cannot fly if it's let out of it pupa earlier than it should be..it have to undergo many processes and struggling in order to FLY (:

SO now some readers might be wondering why am i telling all these and you don't see a link...
well,the message i want to put across is that in LIFE,there's no short-cut to your goals,like the butterfly.In order for us to reach our goals,we have to take step by step,and there's definitely no short-cut...though the process might be ardous,discouraging, but be sure that you will learn something from the process and the success is definitely sweeter than if you take a short-cut (:

so to all readers especially those studying,preparing for exams etc, studying hard and preparations is definitely inevitable for you to do well so Don't give up alright!

well that's all folks!~

2009-06-23T23:37:00.002+08:00

today's another boring,lifeless day for me...
woke up at 9am...lie on bed but lots of thoughts are going my mind...
it's in a whirl...i'm confused and lost...
decided to stop thinking and snapped out of it at 10 .15 am...
when to dress up into my uniform which i have yet to touch it for 3 weeks...
feels like wearing cardboard again....
anyway,rushed off to school for stupid photoshoot...made some crap poses haha...
then rushed back home to change and finish my chicken rice (breakfast + lunch ) before rushing out for tuition...see wad i mean? NO LIFE!!!
urgh...and next week's MYE already!!! dead...dead...dead...
yep....then tuition extended by 1hr and my stomach was growling like washing machine...churning inside...eeew...
then i went back and have a haircut...
it seems as though all the worries are being cut off which i s not true though =.=....
but at least i felt cooler (: much cooler (:
not sure why but i fell asleep on the sofa from 7 to 9 hah....
then watched tv and played a little and here i am posting bout my utmost boring life you've ever known i supposed...
yep...gotta go study...
seeya soon earthlings...
~ ~~~~ ~~~ ~~ ~~~~

2009-06-22T19:31:00.002+08:00

finally found a new blogskin that's less dull and plain and and wadeva lol...
dunno what to post....
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bye~

fucked up..

2009-06-21T13:01:00.003+08:00

Wanted to change skin but can't find a nice one so forget it....

Today's father's day eh....haha....it's been....decadesssssssssssss since i said happy father's day and i SWORE on that very day i'll nvr say it again...(knnbccb)

SORRY to ramble so much crap here and if YOU don't feel like reading,you're free to leave (:

Ever since i was young and started to understand things better, [ok maybe i should say when i was YOUNGER so that i DON'T sound OLD :) ] i've never went out with my father alone...YES NEVER....
Everytime i see kids with their father i get all upset then angry =.= but never revealed how i felt cuz...cuz...scared....afraid or put it in another way, i didn't want to upset my mum...
only in Recent years i began to let out my emotional self...that's why my nickname (EMO-KIA or EMO-KID or WADEVA XD)....
Everytime i listen to ppl complaining about their father i get angry...seriously....i've NEVER gotten anything from my father...each time i wanted something he will give me the KNN black face...and the ppl out there,just because of some small thing you complain...I still remember when i was in primary school...the compo there is always " write about your father" and i NVR knew how to write...so i'll grab those compo modal essays and COPY haha...every year same content....

come to secondary school,thought slightly better...won't do that type of compo but NO! instead i was asked,where's your father?why everytime see your mother with you only....WTF....that's when i change topic and saying smth else....urgh...

so ppl out there,celebrate with your dad today and be happy....
i've always wanted to know how it feels to have a father....hah....

goodbye...

原谅我

2009-06-20T16:42:00.006+08:00

请不要分了以后还记得亲吻过的承诺
你的永久已不属於我默默低头那时我很多话梗在喉咙
你的笑你的快乐不是我爱太多想太多
我能感受他比我适合爱放了手我伪装冷漠比你先说分手

请原谅我原谅我不成熟
不爱你是藉口好让你离开我
请原谅我好想自私将你占有
一个寂寞就给我承受换你过更好的生活

请不要分了以后还记得亲吻过的承诺
你的永久已不属於我默默低头那时我很多话梗在喉咙
你的笑你的快乐不是我爱太多想太多
我能感受他比我适合爱放了手我伪装冷漠比你先说分手

请原谅我原谅我不成熟
不爱你是藉口好让你离开我
请原谅我好想自私将你占有
一个寂寞就给我承受换你过更好的生活

爱过恨过哭过也笑过亲吻过你的脆弱
其实我比谁都要懦弱
原谅我必须假装爱错
别让时间倒流我怕说不出口
原谅我没有解释太多心痛

别无所求彻底忘了我爱原来要舍得
我难过我才懂

2009-06-19T21:17:00.007+08:00

not bad...the camp was not bad...managed to stay up whole night and wasn't even tired :D amazing...
ty and sc bian tai sial...pt pt pt...but it's time to buff-up these ppl though...
went back and slept till 7 haha....so tired lurh....ahh lazy type le....
ta-ta
i purposely went down so that i can see you....i miss you....
i hate myself for not cherishing what was right before me and before i can do smth bout it,it's gone...gone......
imy...

2009-06-14T01:44:00.001+08:00

hey earthlings...just studied smth but nth went in =.= dunno wad to post YET! haha....shall post smth interesting tmr night or should i say tonight....seeya!

2009-06-02T00:22:00.011+08:00

hi there...
went to the children little museum on the 1st of june right after my GP exam which i think i did quite okay but at the same time i think i screwed it....anyway,the trip was quite an eye-opener for me as never would i expect ppl to keep the stuff in the 19 centuries till today...take a look....

€

not that bad i supposed? and straight after we went AS A COHORT ,how cool haha, to LIDO to catch the movie MONSTER VS ALIEN...out of 10 i give it 10 for comedy of the year....worth watching seriously (:

ALRIGHTY gotta go mug my brains out which nvr seems to work after O levels....not sure why...haiz....bye

2009-05-31T22:35:00.002+08:00

HAHA...even got time to blog now....seriously....i've got NO MOOD TO STUDY!!!!shall fail my GP tmr and say bye bye to J2....retaining seems to close now....
haiz....

2009-05-24T13:39:00.002+08:00

haiz....1 more week to hols...which means GP MYE is here....ain't prepared at all....but who can i blame?din listen in class,no mood to study,restless sleepy....all sorts of stuff or should i say excuses i gave...wel....i just have to face it....
Anyway,had my first dizi lesson ytd....ain't as tense as i'd imagine...the teacher's quite easy-going and friendly...quite a good impression...well....time to work hard on it....
ta-ta...time to mug...-.-...someone help me pls....help me relieve off my agony...

2009-05-20T22:53:00.002+08:00

You’re the protector, a Guardian in the midst of chaos. In times of struggle many look to you for guidance. You are strong and carry yourself as a leader, even if you do not realize it at the time. This causes undue stress on you. Unwittingly you carry the worries of others on your shoulders. It is just natural that your strong personality be the dominant force of all interaction. But do not let that go to your head. Make your to take some time to step down from that high perch and let others have a few moments in the sun. You are fiercely loyal and protective of those you care about. At times this seems like a burden, and weighs you down. But the Lion is here to show you how to continue leading yourself and others into the future. Concentrate on the strengths of the Lion and remember that even when things are tough, it is never too late to find a secluded place to rest. Remember that it is okay to remove yourself from a tense situation. You do deserve time for personal reflection.

Sorry

2009-04-15T00:20:00.001+08:00

Sorry!i can't seem to access to blogger..not sure why...so pls relink me at:
Http://ego-amor-vos.livejournal.com/
Sorry!

Sorry

2009-04-15T00:19:00.001+08:00

2009-03-05T22:56:00.002+08:00

urgh...have been mugging like mad for the past few days...even today i'm still mugging for the tests...today's chemistry was amazing...nvr in my life had i seen anything like this before...rather surprised by the test...no wonder the retain rate is so high...
anyway...taking a break from the constant mugging...and muscle aches...
had pe on tues,did circuit training...-,- and now my back muscle is still aching...time for some fitness regime...hah...ouch...then today did 2.4 training...11.16 min...damn it...didn made my target of 11mins...nvm...shall train MORE!! muahahaha....lol...also did squats....leg muscle is tired now..and i can' train solely on my legs so i went home to train my arms wih dumbbells..and hand grips....hope tmr won't feel any strains...if not i'll be KO-ed on sat for my tkd...urgh...
alright gtg...GO JAMES!...lol...=.=...

hope that's not true

2009-03-04T22:06:00.003+08:00

i think i'm begining to understand...don't know if it's true but well...just my strings thoughts...if that's the case...i hate you to the core...

anyway...hectically mugging now like it's gonna be the end of the world such that i can't study anymore...but that's not the case...two tests are coming up,next two days and i don't wanna fail on my very first test my well...it's kinda tough...bio test's over alr and i think i very much screwed it due to time constraints...dang...but that aint gonna hold me back to strive for a better result in another test...but still...chemistry in MJ is rumoured to be a killer where you fail even if you study like mad...well...i'll be having a taste of it tmr...so...wait for the news (:

alright no time to lose...cya...tmr...

2009-02-28T20:41:00.003+08:00

it's raining now...i know it's a lil random but...it's been a long time since it rained at night i realised...and my nights are usually long...don't know why...
anyway,did a few research on my personality...and here are the results...
Introverts:
-are interested in their own thoughts and feelings
-need to have own territory
-often appear reserved, quiet and thoughtful
-usually do not have many friends
-have difficulties in making new contacts
-like concentration and quiet
-do not like unexpected visits and therefore do not make them
-work well alone
Intuitive types
-are mostly in the past or in the future
-worry about the future more than the present
-are interested in everything new and unusual
-do not like routine
-are attracted more to the theory than the practice
-often have doubts
Feeling types
-are interested in people and their feelings
-easily pass their own moods to others
-pay great attention to love and passion
-evaluate things by ethics and good or bad
-can be touchy or use emotional manipulation
-often give compliments to please people
Judging types
-do not like to leave unanswered questions
-plan work ahead and tend to finish it
-do not like to change their decisions
-have relatively stable workability
-easily follow rules and discipline
and here are some descriptions about me which are very true...

INFjs do not show initiative when making contact ..
INFjs know how to establish peace between conflicting sides. They take a neutral position in the conflict, often being fired upon from both sides. They rarely push, shout or show aggressiveness. Instead they punish offenders by completely ignoring them until they realise their mistakes and apologise. INFjs do not like to project themselves: when everybody works, they work too, when everybody rests, they rest too. INFjs often cannot stand violence, conflict and graphic depiction of injuries the rest are in the website: http://www.socionics.com/main/disambiguation.html?INFj
take a look if you're interested (:

Ocbc cyclesingapore

2009-02-22T03:21:00.001+08:00

Hmm,now i'm at the singapore flyer there..haha...doing cip as route marshal..haha..shall update more later:)

haiz...

2009-02-14T23:43:00.000+08:00

It's rather late now,in fact,it's very very late..but i still can't sleep...gotta finish my tutorials..somehow..anyway,
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO EVERYONE!
today is yet another normal day to me...how envious of those couples...nvm...
haiz...bad news bad news...next week onwards,schedule's gonna be damn damn tight...tues,wed and fri,there'll be co. and everyday sch will end earliest by 3.25pm...how nice...and tues' co will end at 8...wth....
i don't have time for blogging!!! gotta run...bye!!!

2009-02-11T21:52:00.002+08:00

well,time to update a lil bit...let's start from...friday then
Friday,6th feb
went to school for orientation again (: then had MMM ( mass-meridian-monopoly),something like amazing race,played all over singapore (: it's real fun..can really see the ENTHU-ness in almost all J1s...esp. my class :p...
undescribable feelings~
Saturday,7th feb
went to school again for the final day of orientation...played wet games throughout till noon,got myself tanned and bathed in sch.haha...then prepared for the ROCK-ON(orientation night) all had loads of fun...fun and laughter all the way!...it ended at..9.30 pm then went to have supper with C3s at whitesands mac.then went home at 11.and slept till next day~....
Sunday,8th feb
nvr really do anything...went to visit mummy in the afternoon,then went shopping for groceries and back home...ready for sch!
Monday,9th feb
start lectures and had lots of notes already...how cool!!!did some tutorials and well,that's all...school ended at 3.25 for me...went home and do more tutorials...haha
well,MJC=mugglers' junior college (:
Tuesday,10th feb
more notes,more lectures,more tutorials (:today's a lil tired for me...don't know why...school ended at 4.15,and i took 81 to inter...feel asleep and woke up on time to alight (: then went home sleep again...lols...
Wednesday,11th feb
could have slept a lil later today but had house meeting..so.no choice...went to participate in road race(21st feb) haha...a.k.a cross country around pasir ris park...gonna be easy!then had chem and bio lectures only!! but teach damn fast...but i understood (: shall read through again...
then had last minute notice that i needa perform for CCA recruitment...so scary la...no warning one...=.=...today was FUN...had lots of laughter...finished 2 tutorials! woots...and maths' too...muahahahaha....mugging is fun!lalala...lol...i'm going crazy soon...for some reason...
well, gonna cont'd my tutorials...bye~

2009-02-05T20:26:00.004+08:00

Today's first day of orientation and it's WAY COOL!!!!! totally play like siao!!!woots!:D got into CALLISTO!!!! muahahaha....lols....den made a few friends...hmm...about 5....tmr will be more :)
tmr there'll be MMM(mass meridian monopoly),an outdoor adventure throughout singapore!!!
can't wait for tmr...

oh yes...see the thing down there???A 2GB thumbdrive,a collar-pin,2wrist bands,a foolscap,a shoe bag and 2 t-shirts worth of only $28....so worth it la!!!!

Here's a pic of our principal absailing down for opening ceremony...so brave!!! and she did it because she cares for us...sweet!

well,having slight stomach-ache now...gotta run!bye!oh ya and i got into my choice of subject combinations!!weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.....ouch....BYE!

starting life in MJ

2009-02-04T20:50:00.005+08:00

Well,school's started already,on a low note by the way.Things are as mundane as ever.
1st day,we had briefings and talks on various subjects as well as demo lectures and course counselling.never really attend those stuff cuz i don't see the point in doing that...anyway,went home afterwards to selected my choice of subject combination and fillling up of personal particulars,only to realise that there's bug in the system that do not allow many of us including the DSA-ed students to choose the subject combi they wanted.dumb.
2nd day ain't any better..talked about school vision,mission and values,sing college anthem(sounds civilised? but actually it only means school song =.=)but it's still nicer than prss' one haha.then there's the course councilling and demo lectures again for those who missed them out the day before.as usual,i skipped every single one of 'em for i had choosen the combination that i'd wanted in school which is BCME=biology,chemistry,maths and econs where all are H2 sujects.my second choice was BCME still but only dropping biology to H1...however,i realised that bio is the main subject needed if i wanna study medicine in NUS so i went home to change my choice in the MJ portal to econs as H1...then i went to prss to play basketball and also there for a meeting which was cancelled (due to some unforeseen circumstances,hah)then went home and discovered that i was on fever...lols...which explains my blurred vision and dizzy spells(: but i'm fine...
3rd day ,which is today,ain't any better...did more cheers which i forgot to mention earlier and all a MASS dance which i had forgotten all the moves...lol...then there was this choir audition for guys BUT! luckily i DSA-ed which spared me from the agony of the singing of la1-la2-la3-la2-la1,also equals to do-re-mi-re-do =.=..so i guess there's benefits to dsa haha

in this three days i didn't really make new friends...for i know we'd be split up into our CG(civics group) tmr hence i don't see the point in building a strong friendship now which is of no use afterwards....
hope my groupings tmr will be better?and i can get into the subject combination that i wanted and also i wanna be in callisto/miranda ONLY!!!please let me get there....

2009-01-21T20:18:00.002+08:00

It's almost going to start school already...i can't imagine how things will be like over there in Meridian...hope it's a lil' like pasir ris?...haiz...and i'm beginning to wonder if i'd made the wrong choice...again...anyway...my mum's got her hearing aids already...wonder how she feels with that thingy on...hope she'll get used to it pretty soon...and...today's the 49th day since my grandmother died...someone used to ask me,why must we die?why can't we live forever...now i clearly understand how that feels...so why must we die?why can't we live forever???can someone tell me why.....

Yay!

2009-01-13T14:10:00.001+08:00

It's really so unexpected...6As...wad really shocked me was my combine humans,english,bio and chem...all the while,these subjects' results never get past B3...and my L1R5 never got better than 16...compared to prelims,i think i made an overall jump of 10 points! Cool!!!so here are my results:)
English-B3
Combine humans-A2
Emaths-A1
Amaths-A2
Physics-B3
Biology-A2
Chemistry-A2
Chinese-A1
Chinese oral-distinction
L1R5=11
I'm so so so happy:)

2009-01-06T13:05:00.003+08:00

just went to many ppl's blog...and i just realised smth...
there's so many events i didn celebrate in 2008...
-my birthday
-christmas
-my mum's birthday
-my grandmother's birthday
-chinese new year(2009)
....
so wth...
urgh....haiz....wadeva....

new yr resolution

2009-01-05T09:09:00.003+08:00

this dead man here got so bored of life...suddenly came up with my new yr resolutions...though a lil' late but...better den nvr? hope this can keep me occupied...for a long period of time~
-good results for o lvls...(more As than prelims)/L1R5 = <15
-new phone...(C905/G705/ samsung pixon)
-new study table
-new bed
-ever-lasting love
-syf(gold)
-save $5 per day so that by may 13th i can have..$580??heh heh
-build up my body
-change my face condition(texture)
i tink i'll stop here...if not there might be no end to it...:P

WOAH!

2009-01-04T20:01:00.002+08:00

BAD DAY!!!!!I had a nightmare regarding my results....L1R5? only my maths and chinese gotten A1....the rest ALL Cs!!!! Hope it won't happen...>.<

2009-01-03T19:08:00.002+08:00

i'm going crazy really soon...haiz....
i miss scoldings...
i miss phone calls...
i miss co...
i miss....the past...maybe i should see a psychiatrist...one that can make me forget everything...let me be someone new....start afresh....

2008-12-23T13:15:00.002+08:00

i tink it's time i update a lil' bit but there's seriously nothing for me to update....so i'll just reply the tags here this time round,starting from the earliest tag.
4th dec
to lynnXINYI :D , don't worry i promise i won't emo le (: and amanda's got new blog so i'll shun bian link it up...

5th dec
to HUIFANG, ya i chose it to match how i felt (: you take care too...

6th dec
to DINGYANG,hey don't worry bout me yea? you've seen me ytd and i look perfectly normal eh? yea...i'm fine(: thanks for being there...seeya soon!

11th-13th dec
to FROST,hey there! thanks for your EARS lol....and thanks for coming ytd! tell you my " story some other time yea? (:

14th dec
to pam,(:(:...lol

15th dec
to lynnXINYI :D,ya i update le...pam's always bad you dunno meh? :P hope 31st dec really can make it....haiz....wait so long....

17th dec
to frost,SMILING~ haha

19th dec
to pam, (:(:

21st dec
to py, yep relink le!

Forget it:)

2008-12-14T19:09:00.003+08:00

Well...some things that i learn from today...Things won't always go by one's way but for me,in fact,it never did.Whenever i wanted to do something since i was younger,it NEVER happens...and today i finally learn the term by HEART- "FORGET IT" and and NEXT time, no matter what happens and i'm not happy,i will not do anything about it,not voice it out,nothing.And treat it as nothing happens so that others will not be affected...but...will there be a next time?doubt so...cuz IT'S MY LAST TIME ....

Forget me ba

2008-12-12T17:31:00.001+08:00

Well,everything in the world is fair i suppose...since you've taken care of me for the past 16 yrs,it's time for me to do the same...i tink it's only fair for you to only remember him and not me because i've been well taken care of but he's not so well taken care of...however...i hate you...you said no matter what happens you wouldn't forget me...in the end you still did...

为什么!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2008-12-03T16:57:00.014+08:00

一波未平,一波又起....

要到什么时候才能恢复以那样????

或许再也没有了....

在这三个月内,

我的日子没有一天过得平淡,安祥,快乐....

几乎每天,都是带着笑脸面对所有的人....

但我一点也不快了....

心理一直忐忑不安,一直带着恐惧....

我不想面对现实....

但我别无选择....

当别人正开开心心的过着"战争"后的日子,

我却还没别解脱....

而切还即将面临另一场豪杰....

上天是否在考验他所赐给我的能力,

还是想弄死我才甘心....

我不知道....

我快支持不住了....

或许也是时候我在变多一次了....

bye bye~

2008-11-24T22:07:00.002+08:00

我变了....我变成了令一个人....
以前的我以不存在了....
以前我不会做的事我现在都做了....
我控制不了我的所做所为....
我的记忆也大不如前.....
我很讨厌现在的我.....
我伤害了太多人.....
我不能在这样下去.....
我以打算与世隔绝.....
那就这样决定了.....

再见各位.....
再也没有承鸿这个人了.....

2008-11-12T13:42:00.001+08:00

Lets101 - Free Dating Site

Lets101 Quizzes - Fun Quizzes

once upon a time.............

2008-11-05T22:00:00.002+08:00

Once upon a time,there was a young little boy.Life was smooth for him.He got everything that he wanted.When he was 11,things didn go as smooth.Life started changing a little.At the age of twelve,things got slightly worse.He fell and hurt himself terribly one day when the year was ending.He picked himself up and move on.Things were still fine the next year. However, when he was fourteen, he fell down one day and broke his left leg.From then on,he survived with only one leg....life was difficult but he hanged on....he accepted his fate and live as if nothing happened..At fifteen,things looked slightly better for him.He took part in a competition and surprisingly,he won with only the support of his left leg.He was really proud.BUT....at the age of 16,life started going down hill again...a friend of his dragged him to take exam together.Because of his best friend,he had no choice but to agree.The first day of the exam,he fell of the cliff and broke his right leg.....but to keep his promise, he crawled his way to the exam hall and take his exam to the end....but....
(want to know the next part of the story? stay tune!)

2008-11-04T00:00:00.000+08:00

Phew.....after 3 weeks of serious exams,written papers are finally over!!!!!!!
the suckiest paper was physics.....but the rest were fine....hope that physics will pass....i'll be glad enough....gosh i'm tired.....

regret?james,that's too bad...

2008-11-01T23:45:00.000+08:00

"If something doesn't kill you,it makes you a better person..." make sense eh? if no, think again.... for an example, when you come across a huge obstacle in life.you feel like giving up and turn back but because of all the encouragement by your friends and family,you carry on your life,over-coming the obstacle.Though it is tough but you managed to get past the nerve-wrecking obstacle.Since the obstacle did not put you down,you learnt how to overcome similar situations in the future so that makes you a better person doesn't it?

Also....sometimes in life,you get a second chance.see below? the first time i fried a egg....i was careless thus i failed....so i tried again and i succeed...

however....in life,most of the things you don't get a second chance.so one should cherish what is still present and not regretting after you lost it.
For those who read this post,remember what is written today.you would not want to be regretful,like how i am now.....time...would never turn back to how it was.....ever......again.....

2008-10-24T21:36:00.002+08:00

today went to school exceptionally early,compared to the past few days and i was super super tired.E maths paper 1 and A maths paper 2 was COOL! unexpectedly EASY!!!!!!!! now i don't have to worry about AMATHS! WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.no more amaths,no more english,no more chinese, no more geog! but still got halfway to go....haiz.....
i'm on my verge of breaking down really really soon....like a person at the edge of a cliff.....i really wanna end it man....what's the point of doing well but for no one to see? will doing good well return everything to normal?.......
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...........................................................sadly....
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.............no.....

2008-09-10T17:37:00.003+08:00

Got a hair cut since it grew longer and there will be a check tomorrow.It's short and refreshing!I can feel the wind that came from the fan caressing my scalp.haha.Furthermore,the shampoo with menthol in it wash rejuvenating.i'm now wide awake even though i felt sleepy earlier.hahaha

here's a picture that i took yesterday night when my hunger pangs acted up again..urgh...
the kaya toast was really nice because i made it....haha....anyone wanna try??:p

well i got to go study for tomorrow's bio.....
ta-ta~

2008-08-30T18:54:00.006+08:00

2008-08-30T18:37:00.005+08:00

2008-08-30T17:31:00.002+08:00

Thought i'll be late today when i woke up at 8am....but i got there at 8.35...lol....so early....then i waited and waited....finally jason was here....followed by wen bin....den we went to the court and joined the rest...played till 11++ and had a finally game...played full court...woots! very very tired! den i went home and ate lunch...den fell asleep on the sofa....ooops....lol....den woke up....bathe den change into uni den go CC take bursary....so cold and so long....=.= wasted so much time....haiz.....now i'm tired again.....dunno what to do now....everything seem so sian....SIAN.....

2008-08-27T21:26:00.002+08:00

something is bugging me these few days....but i can't seem to identify what it is....
i feel weird....all of a sudden i don't feel like studying....it's not exam stress....in fact i'm find exams boring....doing all the same thing again and again.....but this is not what's bugging me....i dunno what it is.....and i'm getting really really irritated by it....!!!!!!!!!

i have low EQ :D

2008-08-21T22:59:00.001+08:00

Your EQ is 113

You usually have it going on emotionally, but roadblocks tend to land you on your butt.

On an average day, you're quite happy, together, and content. You live your life well.
Your emotions aren't always stable, but you can go along with the ups and downs pretty well.

You tend to be motivated, energetic, focused, and level headed.
You see the world pretty rationally, and you don't tend to over dramatize things. When things are bad, you know they eventually have to get better.

What's" Your EQ (Emotional Intelligence Quotient)?

2008-08-11T01:23:00.010+08:00

tuition tuition tuition as usual and i went to tampines mall afterwards to catch a breather and have my dinner.after which i headed to the popular book store to add to my collection of assessments!Nahh just joking.i went home at 9.30pm and had decided to pack my room and to my horror, the room is in such as MESS! :

I could no longer stand it and therefore spend 3 hours clearing up the mess into.....my NEAT & TIDY desktop and well as bookshelf!!!! WOOTS!!!! YEEHA!

so happy ! :)
alrite i'm beat from all the clearing ups...got to go and catch some sleep...
seeya~

???

2008-08-09T23:59:00.001+08:00

Lynn went to NDP~ so jealous can.i also want to go.It had been years since i last went to watch and so far i've yet gotten a chance to...haiz...

I don't believe you really think that way....haiz....nvm.....

SEE this pic????

i don't know why but i will always relate such dark clouds as if the world's coming to an end,probably i really want it to end badly so that i will not be miserable any more?I realised i've been hurt too much,maybe because i'm sensitive,over-sensitive such that i get hurt by minor issues,even words when people don't mean it but who understands?i supposed none?

Anyway, enough of my emotional stuff. I'm here to thank all those who gave me birthday presents,thank you all for your sincerity,it is gladly appreciated:)

i've just came back from having my dinner at pasta mania,taking it as a celebration with my mum and bro.haha. i was and still bloated even though 3 of us had only a 12 inch pizza.(i wonder is it too big or too small for 3 people as 12 inches doesn't seem very big).While eating or i should say began eating, yan ling called and she told me that she picked up $0.10 haha and later $1 !
is she lucky or unlucky? i don't know.she spent it and was saying that the " cursed " coins may curse the shop to close down and my reaction was," LOL ". If that really happened then i would really pity the shop owner for meeting a " terrible " customer.

GOSH! counting down to O levels is only 2 months ( on the average ) and i've not prepared enough for my prelims.Looks like i've got to pick myself up and make up for the loss.This period of time will be difficult for me as i'm trying to make ends meet.i have to stop that and i know i will hurt some people unintentionally and hope you will forgive me.i'm really sorry.i really don't mean it.

A NEW START!

2008-08-08T23:59:00.000+08:00

OFFICIAL OPENING OF MY NEW BLOG ON 080808, 11.59pm!